Spending Valentine's with the one I love

Did I say I was leaving Chicago at 10am, flying to Washington DC and then arriving in Toronto at 3pm?

I'm sorry, I was mistaken. What I meant to say was, I would leave Chicago at 10am, fly to Washington DC and then arrive in Toronto at 3pm if that Washington - Toronto connection hadn't been cancelled twenty minutes ago ... which it had. For purposes of clarity, I should have said that I'm scheduled to take a direct Chicago - Toronto flight at 9pm tonight.

Mmm, 12 hours in Chicago O'Hare.

I'm thinking of changing my motto to
"Dave Bushnell: I get screwed over more by 7am than most people get screwed over all day."

It's a touch on the wordy side, so the font on my business card is going to be tiny!

Fig 1: I'd like to see Survivorman handle this with as much aplomb

California!

Dear "healy",

Thank for you being an unprotected wireless network that is demonically fast. Due to your generosity, I am able to download last night's "Office" as I write this post, all from the comfort of my grandmother's guest bedroom. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to have a nap, but I hope you'll stick around while I sleep.

I hope I dream of things I want to do while here, because I realise I've arrived totally unprepared.

Yours,

DYB

Dumb and mean

Normal airports are bad enough with their unattractive people and their too-loud, too-many conversations, but the Las Vegas airport has that little something extra: slot machines! Everywhere! Why, it's a veritable wonderland of sensory overload!

Taking the shuttle last night from the Edmonton airport to the Travelodge, I fought back some guilt: If I were checking in at 10pm only to check out at 4am, wouldn't that be kind of a waste of money? Could I not just sleep in the airport?

Yes, I could have slept in the airport, but that bed was so good. I'm reminded of that because I want nothing more than a bed right now. A bed and quiet. Those two things, one or both or either, would be heavenly. It's not the unattractive people who bug me; it's their conversations. I actually quite like all the unattractive people. That's one reason I like airports: so many more unattractive people to see! It's like a zoo. Unattractive people come from all over the world to parade themselves for my amusement. Even more beautiful is that they have to sit in airliners to get here, so they've got that little extra bit exhaustion that adds immeasurably to their unattractiveness.

Holy shit these people next to me are so unattractive and so boring.

A couple in matching sweatsuits just walked by.

I LOVE YOU.