Ars Bvshnellica Q&A, Sept 29 2007 edition

For best results, read the Q aloud and pretend A is being said by beloved horror icon Vincent Price.

Q. I loved you in "The Pit and the Pendulum."
A. Thank you, you're very kind.

Q. I thought you were supposed to be moving to South Orange today, but you're back in Ashland. What gives?
A. I did move to South Orange today, but upon entering the apartment I noticed there was no power. I figured I could either spend two days in the dark or come back to Ashland to spend the night and bring more stuff tomorrow morning.

Q. Tomorrow morning? Why not later?
A. The mattress store is delivering my discount mattress tomorrow between noon and 4pm; if I want to be in South Orange by noon, I have to leave Ashland tomorrow morning.

Q. "Discount mattress"?
A. Yeah, the model has apparently been discontinued.

Q. A discontinued mattress? Who cares?
A. Yeah, really. As if neighbors really get into pissing contests over who has the latest mattress model. It is suburbia, though.

Q. *shudder*
A. *shudder*

Q. I thought the utility company was supposed to turn on the power in your apartment yesterday. Did you call them?
A. Yes. They told me that no one was there to let them in.

Q. But I thought you told them earlier that the building superintendent would be there.
A. That's not technically a Q, but yes, I did tell them that, and the super claimed he was around all day, so I don't know what happened. I guess Monday is now the earliest day they can turn on the power for my apartment.

Q. What's your new address going to be?
A. Got a pen? It's:
151 Vose Avenue, apt B12
South Orange, NJ 07079

Q. "Vose". What an ugly word.
A. Try saying it on the phone. Every time I say it I have to say "V as in Victor ..." because it's such a bad word.

Q. It sounds German.
A. Are you surprised?

Q. Hey, I thought I was doing the Q's here.
A. Alright, go ahead.

Q. What's your new phone number?
A. I'm not getting a phone. I'm keeping my cell and once I get the internet hooked up, I'll be using Skype.

Q. What's your cell number?
A. I told you months ago. Search your email.

Q. Which is better, Gremlins 1 or 2?
A. Depends on your mood.

Q. Is it embarrassing that you're 32 and you had to have your mom co-sign the lease?
A. It's on par for my life.

Q. What did you think of The Office's season premiere?
A. Meh.

Q. What are you reading right now?
A. Nothing; I took my books to South Orange today and then left them there.

Q. When do you start your job?
A. Monday.

Q. What are you doing again?
A. I'm doing the layout for the Ukrainian Weekly. It's a newspaper.

Q. Hey, you like doing newspaper layout!
A. And I'm Ukrainian!

Q. When are you going to finish your series of posts on your trip to Europe?
A. I dunno. Sometime.

Q. You can do it this week.
A. Stop bossing me!

Q. I guess I better let you go. Thanks for your half of the Q&A, A.
A. You're welcome, Q.