Hurray, teeth!

Went to my dentist today. Paula, the really pretty hygienist, was on maternity leave, so Tara filled in. Tara is likewise really pretty. My dentist is also really pretty. How does that happen? I'm not complaining, mind you. Every dentist I've had previously has been a creepily clean middle-aged bore, regardless of gender. Now I go to the Pretty Young Gals dental practice.

The only annoying thing about going to the Pretty Young Gals dental practice is when the pretty young gals get mad at you for not flossing. Me, I don't enjoy the flossing so much. It was while Tara was giving my teeth the once-over that I figured out the solution to my dislike of flossing: hire a pretty young gal to come over every night and floss my teeth for me.

I don't see how that could be too expensive. At ten minutes a day, a year of flossing comes to just over 60 hours. Now let's say the pretty young gal charges $15/hour -- for the low, low, low-ish price of $900 per year, messed-up gums would be a thing of the past. Of course, the price of floss wouldn't be included, so altogether the cost would be ... $910? I don't know how much a year's worth of floss costs.

Yeah, that's still a pretty steep price to pay for my own laziness.

Wait ... "lazy"? Me? Impossible! I just finished putting a second bed in my bedroom. That's a lot of work, especially if you don't have room for the second bed.

This is just ridiculous. I don't have room for a second bed. There's a reason why most people limit themselves to one bed per bedroom: how many beds can you sleep in at once? I suppose if you toss and turn a lot, having a second bed will give you lots more room for your nocturnal gymnastics, but it's workable only if the beds are at equal heights ... which mine aren't. Egad, this is retarded.

It's arguable that in the time it took me to move all my shit around and put the second bed in, I could have completed half of my assignment. It's further arguable that in the time it took me to write this post, I could have completed the other half of my assignment.

But hey, look at my teeth! Squeaky clean and nary a cavity!