Senses-shattering sullenness, in the great Dave tradition!

Oh my God, I'm 17 again. It's this house full of unwanted guests, it's making me mentally devolve. I spent 5 p.m. to 11 p.m., ie now, hiding in the basement.

I went up around a half-hour ago to go to the bathroom (outside), and as I headed out the door my mom was heading in. I could hear my aunt in the next room.

[this is all translated from Ukrainian]

Aunt [loud voice]: Dave knows how to play poker, don't you, Dave?
Dave [loud voice, lying]: No, I don't know how.
Mom [whisper to Dave]: Don't know how to do what?
Dave [whisper to Mom]: Whatever it is they want me to do.

Zing! Ukrainian-to-English zing!

I went out for pee-pee and stayed out for fifteen minutes. It was a lovely night: bright stars, quarter-moon, just a little cool. I saw a shooting star and made a wish out of habit, but then remembered that falling stars aren't even stars: they're meteors, or pieces of Skylab, or Major Tom.

fig. 1: Major Tom

I was suddenly in the presence of several fireflies. It was lovely. And then I heard what sounded like a dog with emphysema, and then I heard it again, and then I thought I heard it coming closer, so I went inside posthaste. Upon returning inside I was informed that my extended family has eaten all the leftovers (lasagne, sandwiches, two types of pasta salad, hot dogs). I'd tell them to bite me, but then they actually might.