Friday the 13th Part 11: Jason Goes to Wallyworld

Right now on the Lifetime Movie Network:

TripFall (2000) -- A serial killer kidnaps a family vacationing at an amusement park in Southern California. Eric Roberts, John Ritter, Rachel Hunter.

It started 30 minutes ago, so it's too late to find out how one guy kidnaps an entire family from an amusement park. One at a time, I'm guessing, but who can say? Maybe they all got kidnapped when they were on the log ride together, and the killer got on and redirected the log to go straight to his van in the parking lot.

If my dad is reading this: your high school may be under the impression that you're a fugitive from justice. After one too many alumni magazines from the Cate School (cate.org), I suggested to mom that I email the Alumni Director and tell her to cut it out with the mail already. So email her I did, saying, "David A. Bushnell has been living outside the country for several years. I do not have his current address. Mail sent to this address is exceedingly unlikely to find him.... " In hindsight, I could have included your email address, but then they'd just track you down and send you the alumni magazine. The postage to Thailand would be so excessive that they might have to raise tuition, which is already over $33,000 USD, and I don't want a bunch of yuppie parents mad at us. 33 grand is a lot, but considering it's a co-ed boarding school, it's probably worth it.

You know. For the teenaged sexual hijinks.

I also imagine it'd be like an all-you-can-eat buffet for serial killers, but I suppose the parking's better at amusement parks.